What would happen to Elon Musk if he lived in Ukraine with Tesla Factory in Poltava

Author : Ilya Kenigstein

Source : Ilya Kenigstein Facebook

Let us imagine what would become of Elon Musk and Tesla company in Ukraine
17:00, 1 October 2018

If Elon Musk lived in Ukraine and headed the Tesla Factory somewhere in Poltava region, he could write in Twitter whatever he wanted. Nobody is reading Twitter here anyway. And even if we were reading it, nobody would take it seriously. On our side of the planet, the company’s stocks cannot go up over tweet or a post on Facebook. They also cannot go down like this. And it is not because of the attitude to the information, but more because there are almost no companies’ stocks in the first place. There is no Securities Commission, which would be enraged over this. Well, we do have such a commission, but practically speaking, we do not. You know what I mean.

But, let’s assume he put a foot in one's mouth. The stockholders are furious and demand his resignation. However, Musk disagrees. Instead of recognizing his fault, he is doing the rounds on TV channels, radio stations and smokes grass live. To cut it short, there’s a conflict. How would it be solved in our sweet home?

On Monday, Tesla Factory would be visited by the State Fiscal Service to check observance of the law on the conclusion of employment contracts.

On Tuesday, State Emergency Service would visit stating inobservance of fire safety rules, the absence of emergency stairs/signalizations, smoking outside of designated places.

On Wednesday, State Architectural and Construction Inspection of Ukraine would come over inobservance of maintenance rules, rules of housing and utilities services, using water systems, drain system, heat supply system.

On Thursday, the fighters of the Chief Administration in Fight with the Organized Crime of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of Ukraine (HUBOZ) would come on the armoured car in uniforms and with rifles. They would endlessly search and confiscate the servers and other office equipment.

On Friday, some shady guy would come to the office with a folder and voice the conditions in an ultimate form. Elon would have been asked to reflect for 48 hours, consult with his wife.

On Saturday, Musk would be forced to a prison cell, for one day at first. In order to take him to the shareholders meeting directly from the prison on Sunday. And then to the restaurant. The shareholders would sit with bored faces at the long table filled with salads and bottles, time from time getting distracted by calls and waiters. At the next table, their bodyguards would loudly discuss who will take Musk into the woods. The shareholders' meeting would take place in a very tense but informal atmosphere. Musk would be offered to leave his office voluntarily and give up his share in favor of the lawyers present at the meeting. The lawyers would also sit at the table, holding a ready-made deal in their hands.  

And the next morning at the factory, there would be a general meeting of employees accompanied by hired thugs. And the workers would be presented a new head:

- Congratulations. This is Vasya Pupkin. He is your new director, instead of Elon Musk. For all the questions, contact Vasya. Where is Elon, you ask? He flew to Mars.

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